


Iplier/Septic Ego Oneshots and Drabbles

by TheDarkestShade



Series: Ego things [1]
Category: Video Blogging RPF, Who Killed Markiplier? (Web Series), markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Actor Mark is a dick, Dark likes lace dresses, Domestic Violence, F/M, Fights, Gen, Gods I love Celine, How Do I Tag, I love these fuckers to death, I'm Bad At Tagging, Mark Fischbach Egos, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sean McLoughlin Egos, Such a Badass, The doctor is a stubborn one, Wil also knows this now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-10-25 11:30:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20723492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkestShade/pseuds/TheDarkestShade
Summary: Yo!! This thing is old. From now on I'll be posting everything as separate works.uhhh.. here's some oneshots? I suck at writing other people's characters, so that's why I decided to do this. Let's hope I get better over time hahaPlease note that English isn't my first language, so please excuse sentences or words that just don't seem right





	1. Sick Doctor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate this with my entire being but I am sick so I had to drag y'all down with me. 
> 
> It's so badly written and boring to read, it's incredible. The only reason I finished this was because I cannot start something and not finish something in the same session as long as I have time.  
Sorry for this disaster, I'll probably rewrite it sometime

Dr. Iplier swiftly closed the door to the clinic, sniffling, before a small triumphant smile graced his features. He'd somehow managed to get coffee and tissues without anyone noticing he was sick. Had that happened, he wouldn't be in his office right now. He took out one of the aforementioned tissues and blew his nose, before throwing it in the trashcan. He took a sip of his burning hot coffee, forever grateful to whoever invented the dirty bean water. This was his first cup this morning, and he sighed in annoyance as he realised he'd have to go back out to refill his cup soon.  
That morning he'd woken up to a headache, a stuffed nose, and a fever. Of course, he'd known he was sick, but that didn't mean he could slack off work. He was a doctor, damnit! He grunted as his headache acted up again, before making his way over to his desk. He would get through this day if it was the last thing he did.  
The first one to come into the clinic was the Host, who's bandages needed to be changed. Dr. Iplier made sure to suppress his sniffles as much as possible, quickly cleaning the Host's sockets and refreshing the bloodied bandages. Running on nothing but coffee and determination, he missed the Host's amused smirk as he left the clinic.

The next to come in was King, who'd fallen out of a tree while trying to help out one of his subjects. The doctor gave him a lecture on the danger of his actions as he checked to see if anything was broken. He sent King away with advice and some Tylenol for the royal's headache. In his sick haze, he missed King's giggles as he left the office.

The third to come into the clinic was Eric, dragged in by Reynolds who was afraid he had been hurt outside. The doctor sighed in annoyance as he examined Eric, finding nothing but a few bruises. When he questioned him about them, the anxious man admitted they were caused by him bumping into things around the house. After Dr. Iplier explained to Reynolds that this did not, in fact, mean Eric was attacked, he shoved them out of his office, headache near unbearable at the stupidity he had to deal with. He didn't notice the two's silent exchange as they left the clinic.  
Dr. Iplier was sitting at his desk, sipping from his 9th cup of coffee, when the door opened again. Expecting one of the more.. idiotic egos, he sighed and closed the file he had opened on his desk. When he looked up, however, he was surprised to find Dark and Wilford stumbling into the room. Wilford was supporting the monotone man, who looked like he could collapse at any given moment. The doctor rushed over to the pair, careful not to bump into anything.

"What the hell happened?"

Dark only grunted in response, leaving Wilford to answer the doctor's question: "Well y'see, Dark here's got quite the illness, doc. ‘S quite a pity." Dr. Iplier quickly took Dark from the mustached man and put him in the bed that was in the clinic. When he was done, he turned to Wilford again: "Can you please leave us? I need space and quiet." To his surprise, and Wil's credit, the crazed man obliged, closing the door quietly as he left. The doctor turned back to his patient, suppressing a cough as he did. Dark was sitting upright, an old cane in his hand. The doctor saw his knuckles turning white with the force he was exerting on the thing. He cleared his throat and Dark looked up at him, his grip on the cane relaxing. Dr. Iplier quickly took a sip of his coffee and got a notebook, ready to write down whatever Dark had to say. However, he didn't get far before Dark took the notebook from his hands and stood up. the doctor stumbled back in surprise, annoyed that even Dark thought it was alright to waste his precious time. The feeling of a cold hand on his shoulder grabbed his attention.

"Doctor. Don't think we haven't noticed."

Dr. Iplier sighed in annoyance and shook Dark's hand off of his shoulder. "I'm a doctor, Dark. I should be there for my patients. I can't just take a day off, you of all people should know this." Dark pinched the bridge of his nose, annoyed: "You might think so, but I am certain we would survive without a doctor for a few days." When the stubborn doctor didn't respond, he continued: "Besides, we still have Wilford. He knows more about this than you might think." The doctor sighed and crossed his arms, realising he wouldn't win against Dark. "How did you know?" He knew it was a stupid question, but figured he could as well ask. Dark raised an eyebrow and chuckled. "You didn't come out of the clinic once, doctor. Excluding the fruitless attempt at going unnoticed." The doctor groaned. He should've known he'd been noticed. getting away from the Host's narrations was quite hard, after all. Nobody except for Wilford had been able to pull it off.  
Dr. Iplier was about to try and shove the grey man out of his office when Dark cleared his throat. "If you think I will let you continue like this, I am very sorry to inform you I won't. I don't want everyone to get sick because of you." With this, Dark grabbed the doctor's arm and before he knew it, he was in his own room.

"The Host is amused to see Dark had to use force to get the stubborn doctor to his room." Both Dark and Dr. Iplier grumbled as the Host chuckled and got up from the doctor's bed, where he'd been waiting for the pair to arrive. Dark let go of Dr. Iplier's arm and gently pushed him to the bed. "You should rest. Let us manage the clinic." The doctor was about to protest again when he suddenly felt himself become very tired. He sent a glare to the Host, who was smirking mischievously. He yawned as he stalked over to his bed, barely registering the Host's words as he laid down. He did, however, register his clothes being replaced by pyjamas. As the Host's narrations put him to sleep he sighed, not regretting his carelessness that morning one bit.


	2. Fight- Mark & Celine (drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by a conversation prompt by whygodohgodwhy on Tumblr!
> 
> “You’re still in the wrong though.”
> 
> “What? How could you not have my back?”
> 
> “Have you not been paying attention to our relationship? Have we ever agreed on anything? Ever? Fighting is pretty much all we have.”
> 
> Celine gets slapped and Mark gets punched, but that's about it

"You're still in the wrong though." The seer remarked.

"What? How could you not have my back?" Mark's words were cold but he was talking animatedly, betraying how angry he was.

"Have you not been paying attention to our relationship? Have we ever agreed on anything? Ever? Fighting is pretty much all we have."

Celine sighed in annoyance, completely unable to understand just how Mark thought this was going to work. She zoned out as Mark started lecturing her about her behaviour again. _That's the fifth time this week. Asshole._ She chuckled humourlessly, causing Mark to shut up and look at her in disbelief. "Are you even listening?" The seer shrugged, done with her husband's attitude. "No, not really. You're not that interesting."

Next thing she knew her cheek was burning and Mark was glaring at her, seething. She raised a hand to her face in disbelief, taking a moment to recover. "Did- did you just slap me?" She breathed heavily, trying to conceal her anger. However, she was never known for being patient, and a moment later Mark was recoiling, struck in the face by the seer. She cradled her hand, still seething.

"You know, you're not supposed to hit a lady."

With that, she turned around and stormed outside. She'd have to stay with Will for the night.


	3. How Wilford reduces Dark to a blushing mess (drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ...I like this one. Then again, I also really like the idea that Will was in love with Dames and therefore also in love with Dark. Doesn't make a lot of sense, but I'd like to hope it does.
> 
> Also, poor Dark. He's never gonna live this down.
> 
> Prompt is by write-it-motherfucker on Tumblr! (Yes I really love my prompts lol)

“Soooo…..lace huh?”

Dark jumped and turned around, the black lace dress he was wearing swirling with him. 

“Not another word.”

Wilford came in, completely ignoring the request Dark had just made. As soon as he closed the door, he rushed over to the monotone man, taking his hand and kissing it. He giggled as Dark’s face turned beet red as he quickly pressed his hand to his chest, trying to hide his face in his other hand. “Wil. Please, do _ not. _ ” Wilford ignored the threat as he ruffled Dark’s hair, resulting in an indignant shriek from the latter. “Why shouldn’t I see you wearing this?” The pink man asked, tilting his head. “You’d look great as a lady, you know.” Dark smiled sadly, getting lost in thought. _ If only you knew. _

He was dragged back to reality when a flash blinded him, and he recollected himself just in time to spot Wilford putting his phone away, a huge grin on his face. Dark’s face flushed as he tried to take the phone and almost succeeded. But Wilford was fast, and he was gone before Dark managed to take the phone from his hands. The dark being cursed and gave himself two minutes before the entire household would be in front of his office door. Sighing, he changed back into his suit and took his trusty cane. 

He might as well enjoy the few minutes of peace by taking a walk outside.


End file.
